Meanwhile, I Keep Dancing

Day 21: Pain Pg 15 of The True Secret of Writing: Connecting Life With Language by Natalie Goldberg. When you are a cis woman you are raised to believe that other's pain is your problem you practice hugging and making soothing sounds leave a space in your frontal lobes for distressed faces and shut off body  language always on guard you learn how to save  people ow to do the hard things for them so they won't feel pain And while you are learning to help others  heal pain you learn about blunting yourself because you are a potential weapon too diminish your anger cool your hot words stuff the sharpness of your feelings down to the bottom These lessons bore done into our bones sit and poke  become shame and guilt if we stray And to this day these words are as natural to me as breathing I utter then without realizing I'm Sorry I'm sorry I said that I'm sorry I can't make it out tonight I'm sorry I disappointed you Yelled ...

Day 6: Powered From T uning the Human Biofield by Eileen Day McKusick The talk these days has been sustainable energy wind powered ocean powered sun powered cars that glid between electicty and the black blood of dinosaurs and the people of Seattle slog along drenched in 5 months of gloom You would think by this time we would find a way to harness the rain soak it into our cells and create a fission under our skin become electric ourselves meet strangers eyes with wide smiles extend our hearts farther than our wallets for a rainbow drink I've been practicing an ancient  alchemy passed down from mother to daughter turning heartbreak into love tears become an elixir of release I am not shamed I am not shamed I am not shamed My anger, ghost pepper hot and molten lava red fuels my need for growth and change I am not shamed I am not shamed I am power