30 Day Poetry Challenge: Day 16: PRONOUNCED

Day 16: Pronounced

P. 201 from Fragile Things by Neil Gaiman, in the story How Do You Think It Feels?

There is this memory I keep coming back to
of a hot day in junior high
running around
sweating
laughing
breathing deep into the corners of my lungs

and afterwards
being asked by a classmate if I was ok
if I needed to sit down
I just looked at them in confusion
and realized I needed to reasure them I was fine
my flushed sweat soaked face and frizzy hair
was normal

How can you make yourself small when you are born large?
From my curls to my lungs to my heart
Standing out
apart from the crowd
different
has not felt like a challenge
it just is

I knew my place
at the back of the class picture
since 3rd grade
And permanent Dandelion hair
laid out my fate

Taking up space was a horror to an overweight highschooler
my shell was a navy blue sweatshirt
hood scrutched up around my neck
to hide fat
shame
I loathed tight shirt styles
and crop tops
pants always awkwardly short

But
I learned how to not give a fuck
to be ok will all of me
ALL OF ME
to love early hair and inch of me

And apologize for none of it

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